What Hurts the Most
by The Jasper Raven
Summary: Words that Naruto never got to say, haunt him in his sleep and, not so far away, Sasuke finally understands what's missing in himself. There were words he left unspoken as well. [SasuNaru]


"What Hurts The Most"

**A/N: Happy Birthday darksoul1313!! I chose to do a NaruSasuke fic as your birthday present! This is my first SasukexNaruto fic. It's to the song "What Hurts the Most" by Rascal Flatts. I hope you'll like it!! LOL XD **

"What Hurts the Most"-Rascal Flatts

Sasukez

SasukexNaruto

Dedicated to darksoul1313 (other readers: Read her fic "What Happens Under the Bed Stays Under the Bed" its FUNNY!!)

_I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house_

_That don't bother me_

_I can take a few tears now and again and just let them out_

_I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while_

_Even though going on with you gone still upsets me_

_There are days every now and again I pretend I'm okay_

_But that's no what gets me_

"Sasuke!"

Naruto sat up in bed, sweating up a storm. The room was empty and the only sound was his own shallow breathing and the easy rainfall on his roof. He was alone. Though he'd screamed for the one person he really cared about; even he wasn't there.

_Sasuke…_

The name echoed throughout Naruto's mind. It was because of Sasuke that he'd woken up. The nightmare was so vivid in his mind. He'd never had dreams he could remember afterwards. This one was about Sasuke. It was about Sasuke getting attacked by snakes; getting buried under snakes; and getting bound from him by snakes. He had been reaching out to Naruto and had been pleading to him to help him. Naruto didn't know what to help him with though. He had been swallowed up by a torrent of snakes.

Naruto shivered. His bright blue eyes fell upon the window and the living portrait of a gray sky and flooded streets. Was it raining in the Sound Village? Was Sasuke looking at the rain too? Sometimes, Naruto felt like he could feel Sasuke through the raindrops. Naruto didn't hold back his tears. He wasn't in public. He didn't have to pretend that he didn't miss Sasuke…he missed him more than anything in the world. It hurt that he couldn't bring him back. It hurt that his words seemed to mean absolutely nothing to Sasuke.

_Sasuke…was it worth leaving us? Do you regret anything about leaving us…about leaving me?_

_What hurts the most_

_Was being so close_

_And having so much to say_

_And watching you walk away_

_And never knowing_

_What could've been_

_And not seeing that loving you _

_Is what I was tryin' to do_

Naruto got out of bed and rubbed his eyes. He glanced at his clock. 5:36 a.m. Training wouldn't start for another four hours. Normally it would start at 6:00 a.m. but knowing Kakashi he'd be there at 10:00 a.m. to start the training. Naruto stared at his reflection in a mirror. For a second, he saw Sasuke in the mirror beside him. He almost felt him squeeze his hand. The hallucination smiled gently at him. Naruto steeped towards Sasuke but he had vanished. Naruto's throat tightened. He'd said a lot during their battle but he still had so much more to say. He'd never said his _real _feelings. He said he looked up to Sasuke and how much he wanted to be his friend. He didn't want to be his friend. He didn't want to be his enemy. He wanted to be his most precious person.

Did he feel anything for him? Did he listen to _anything _he had said that day? Was he hurting as much as him? Did he even care? Was he happy there? Jiraiya had said Sasuke was safe for three years. He wasn't worried that Orochimaru would hurt him. Why couldn't he stop him? Why couldn't he have been stronger? Naruto changed into his orange track suit and rummaged through his dresser for his Konoha headband. He felt cold metal and pulled it out. His face fell when he realized it wasn't the headband he wanted. He still had it…Sasuke's old Konoha headband that Naruto had scratched. It symbolized that he was a traitor, a rogue ninja. He didn't belong to Konoha anymore. Nartuo squeezed the headband a single tear falling onto the cold metal.

_It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go_

_But I'm doin' it_

_It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone_

_Still harder_

_Getting up, getting dressed, livin' with this regret_

_But I know if I could do it over_

_I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart_

_That I left unspoken_

Sasuke stared at the ceiling from his bed deep in the Sound Village. His nightmare hadn't been of the Uchiha massacre or of his brother like usual. This time it had been of Naruto. Sasuke had been scared in his dream and scared when he woke up. He was afraid of Orochimaru and his power over snakes. Naruto had been running to him but he couldn't move from where he was. Sasuke was bound to the spot by snakes and he couldn't go to him. It was raining in the Sound Village. Sasuke took his eyes away from the ceiling and looked out the window at the pouring rain. He sighed and sat up in bed. 5:36 a.m. Orochimaru would be there soon to flirt with him.

_I hate that guy._

Sasuke pulled open his bedside table drawer and reached inside. He pulled out a single framed photo. It was the one of his squad. The one where Naruto was glaring at him over Sakura's head and he wasn't paying attention to him. Sasuke's hand strayed over the picture of Naruto. He sighed and his eyes returned to the rainy window. Suddenly, each raindrop leaking from the sky was reflecting an image of each of his comrades from Konoha. A smile graced his lips. That smile died when a knock came at the door. Sasuke hid the photo under his pillow just in time for Orochimaru to enter.

"Good. You're awake," he slithered.

Sasuke didn't reply but kept him in his gaze.

"You should get dressed. You have Taijutsu battle practice with Sugiestu soon."

"Yes my lord," Sasuke forced himself to say.

The grin on Orochimaru's face made Sasuke shudder. Once he was gone, Sasuke retrieved his photo from under the pillow. He didn't want to train with Sugiestu. He wanted a different battle partner. Not Juugo, Kabuto, or Orochimaru.

_Naruto…why am I thinking so much about Naruto?_

_**Because you love him, **_a voice in his head said.

Sasuke didn't deny it. He _did _love Naruto. The day they fought, Naruto's words tore Sasuke apart and stabbed his heart. But, Naruto had just said he looked up to him; that he was his best friend. He hadn't said what Sasuke wanted him to say. That's why he left him.

_Naruto…I wanted you to say…that you…love me too…I wish I told you. If you knew…then maybe you'd feel more for me…_

Sasuke got out of bed, putting his photo back in his drawer. He went to his closet. Orochimaru wanted him to wear that open-shirt, man-skirt outfit all the time. Sasuke hated that outfit. He looked for something else. He found some black shoes, long black pants, and a white T-shirt. Sasuke hesitated in removing his shirt. He _really _didn't want to do this battle training. He'd get distracted and Orochimaru would wonder what's wrong. All he could think about was Naruto and what he wished he could've said that day.

_What hurts the most_

_Is being so close_

_And having so much to say_

_And watching you walk away_

_And never knowing_

_What could've been_

_And not seeing that loving you_

_Is what I was trying to do_

Sasuke was dressed and his Taijutsu training gear was packed in a bag. He stood with his back to his bedroom door. What was the point if he was just going to lose? He couldn't bear listening to Sugiestu brag that he beat the "amazing Sasuke." Sasuke stared out the window. The rain was starting to die. He looked out at the trees. Konoha was a few hours away. Would they accept him back if he showed up without warning? The others didn't matter as much to him. All he wanted was to see Naruto and tell him the truth.

Sasuke glanced behind him and out the bedroom door. Could he escape without Orochimaru catching him? His heart started racing. This was his chance to get away and go home to the one he cared about. Sasuke opened the window. The rain was almost gone. Sasuke gulped down his fear of Orochimaru catching him and stepped on the windowsill. He focused his chakra down to the soles of his shoes and stepped onto the wall closing the window behind him. Quietly, Sasuke scaled the wall. Once he reached the ground he bee lined into the woods.

XXX

Karin was in her room staring at her secret photos of Sasuke. She was humming to herself, picking out the sexiest pictures she'd caught.

_Maybe I should go "pay him a visit."_

Karin giggled to herself and put her little scrapbook away. She left her room and headed to Sasuke's room.

_He should be getting changed for Taijutsu, one-on-one battle training with Sugiestu. Maybe I'll be lucky and catch him with his clothes off!_

Karin blushed as she approached Sasuke's room. His door was open. Quietly and stealthily, Karin peeked around the rim of the door. Her hopes were abolished. Sasuke wasn't there.

_Aw man. Well at least I'll see him shirtless and all sweaty in training. Oooo…so sexy._

Karin decided to snoop around Sasuke's room. His bed was unmade and some of his dresser drawers were still open. She didn't realize Sasuke could be so sloppy. Then, Karin spotted Sasuke's Taijutsu training gear bag on the couch below the window. Why wouldn't Sasuke bring that with him to the indoor training field? Or wasn't he there? Karin looked out the window just in time to catch Sasuke running away from the hideout.

_Oh man. Lord Orochimaru is sure going to be pissed._

XXX

Sasuke already felt a great many presences chasing after him on his way to Konoha.

_How did he find out? Does he have security cameras in my room or something? He's sick enough to do that. I need to pick up the pace._

Sasuke jumped from tree branch to tree branch, trying to shake them. He needed to get home before them. He needed to see Naruto.

_If only for a couple seconds. Just so I can tell him the truth…_

XXX

The rain had stopped and the sun was peeking a little past the clouds. Naruto was dressed and wandered aimlessly through the village. He still had like 10 hours until training. Sakura and Sai were probably already waiting at the Training Field. He didn't care. He didn't want to be near them. Sakura acting fangirlish over Sai and Sai's bad attitude only made Naruto remember all the mornings he'd stood there glaring at Sasuke.

_Sasuke…if only you could see how miserable I am without you. They can assign as many replacements as possible to Squad 7…none of them can replace you. You're one of a kind._

Naruto found himself in the Hidden Leaf Forest. In a matter of minutes, he guessed, he would be lost. He'd rather be lost than at the Training Field.

_Lost with Sasuke…if only…_

_What hurts the most_

_Is being so close_

_And having so much to say_

_And watching you walk away_

_And never knowing_

_What could've been_

_And not seeing that loving you_

_Is what I was trying to do_

Naruto found himself on a dirt path leading into the Hidden Leaf Forest. Naruto wondered what was beyond the very edge of the forest. Could it be the Sound Village? Could it be where Sasuke was? Naruto trudged, thoughtlessly, down the path.

_Sasuke…why were you calling for help. Do I need to save you from the snakes? Save you from Orochimaru? Was Jiraiya-sensei wrong? Is Orochimaru hurting you?_

Naruto's mind played tricks on him again like that morning in the mirror. On the path ahead of him, Naruto saw a Sasuke-hallucination running towards him.

_Sasuke…if only I could see you again…the __**real **__you. These illusions are tormenting me._

Naruto could almost hear Sasuke's rapid footsteps pounding on the Earth as he ran. He could almost hear his voice calling his name in distress and joy. The illusion ran closer and closer and closer. It wasn't going to stop! Then reality hit Naruto in a soft tackle into some bushes.

_Wait! This is no illusion! It's the real Sasuke!_

"Sa--!"

Before Naruto could say his name, Sasuke covered his mouth with his hand. Sasuke was on top of him and was pressed very close to him. Naruto felt hot. Then he heard voices above them.

"He's gone."

"He can't be gone! Find him! NOW!!!"

There was the sound of fading footsteps and then silence. Naruto looked up at Sasuke. His mouth was still covered but not by Sasuke's hand. Naruto realized Sasuke was kissing him.

_S-Sasuke…_

He'd imagined this moment in his dreams every night. It was nothing like his fantasies. It was 50x better. Sasuke's kiss was warmer and softer than he expected. His touch was soft and comforting. Naruto felt Sasuke's fingers slipping down his cheek; stroking his face. The feel of Sasuke's lean well-muscled chest rising and falling on his own was invigorating. He felt his breath entering his mouth. Naruto sighed back into Sasuke and placed his hand behind Sasuke's head. His raven hair was soft—almost fluffy. Naruto held his head against his so that the kiss wouldn't end. They breathed through one another to try and keep the kiss going as long as possible. Sasuke broke the sweet kiss. Naruto looked into those beautiful, coal, black eyes.

"Naruto…I love you. I'm sorry I left you behind. I couldn't stay if you didn't feel the same way I did. You said you wanted to be my best friend and that you looked up to me. You didn't say what I wanted you to say. I couldn't bear staying behind with those feelings bottled up inside. I know it's bad to leave just in general too but—"

Naruto pulled the crying, hysterical 15-year-old back against his mouth. Sasuke was caught off guard. Naruto rolled on top of him and pinned him to the ground, kissing him passionately. When Naruto stopped they both gasped for breath.

"N-Naruto…"

"I love you too Sasuke. I didn't tell you before because I didn't think you loved me back. It looks like we both faced the same dilemma."

"We're not mind-readers," Sasuke said, his face glistening with tears. "Can we still be together? Even after what I did?"

"Of course!"

"What will Kakashi and Sakura think?"

"Who cares? What matters it that we both know the truth."

Sasuke smiled and wrapped his arms around Naruto's neck.

"I love you."

"I love you too. I always have and always will."

"Yeah. Me too."

_Not seeing that loving you_

_That's what I was trying to do_

**A/N: YAYS!! I hope you liked it darksoul!! I think I might've rushed the end though. For my first attempt at NaruSasuke I think it was cute!! Happy Birthday! **


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